


A Prince, a Princess, a demon, and Four Smurfs Walk into a Bar/For Whom the Pig Oinks

by Ireallylovepuppies101



Series: The Disenchantment AU Crossover [1]
Category: Disenchantment (Cartoon 2018), Smurfs, Trolls (2016)
Genre: AU, Disenchantment AU, F/F, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:14:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 16,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25510402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ireallylovepuppies101/pseuds/Ireallylovepuppies101
Summary: An AU created by the PriestessOfNox and I, we created an AU based on the Netflix show Disenchantment featuring the dreamworks trolls and the smurfs. These two chapters being the first two episodes.About to be married for an alliance, Branch and his honorary sister Poppy find themselves on an adventure with Branch's new personal demon and four small creatures called the smurfs.(Sequel to PriestessOfNox's fic Before Disenchantment.)
Relationships: Branch (Trolls)/Schtroumpf Costaud | Hefty Smurf, Creek (Trolls)/Schtroumpf à Lunettes | Brainy Smurf, Queen Poppy (Trolls)/La Schtroumpfette | Smurfette (Les Schtroumpfs)
Series: The Disenchantment AU Crossover [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1848094
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	1. Chapter 1

As the sun rose up to great the kingdom of Dreamland, the sound of its citizens singing to greet the day began to grow in volume.

Today was a day of celebration!... Though frankly so was every day in this kingdom, but it was for an extra special reason!

The adopted prince of the royal pop family prince Branch was to be married!

Humming to herself, the castle troll maid and nanny Miss. Frizz walked to the prince's bedroom. Nodding a greeting to the guards before walking in, the beloved nanny pulled back the curtains at the window.

"Rise and shine sweetie! Time to get ready for your special day!"

Approaching the bed, Miss. Frizz pulled back the blankets. A startled gasp came from her before she sighed. "Oh dear, not again."

Pulling the gag from the guard's mouth, Miss. Frizz got to work freeing the poor Bergen man as he begged.

"Please, send me to Bergen Town, or put me on toilet duty! Anything is safer than guarding that prince!"

With the guard now free, Miss. Frizz moved back to the window to inspect it. The new lock on it was picked open and a rope dangled from outside. Honestly, she warned the king that locking Branch's window wouldn't work.

“Don’t be silly, Branch is a good boy. He’s just trying to get rid of his, pre-wedding jitters.”

_______

Studying his cards, Branch, the adopted prince of the pop trolls and currently the only gray troll in the 6 kingdoms, glanced at his opponent who refused to break his poker face.

Halfway through the game of cards, the tourist decided to take it up a notch, instead of betting buttons like most pop trolls use to shop and trade in their kingdom, he decided to use gold coins. Not that Branch was complaining. Actual coins might be useful in case there’s a problem he runs into outside of Dreamland.

Thinking for a moment, Branch reached up and took off his crown. Styled out of colored metal to look like leaves. In the middle of it was a spot where a troll gem was to be placed once a trolling got theirs.

But due to certain circumstances, Branch had a small rectangular plate of gold where his gem was supposed to go.

Fiddling with his crown until the gold popped off, Branch put it down on the pile on the table. “All in.”

The man smirked as he showed his cards. Thinking he won he started to pull the winnings close to him before the prince stopped him. “I don’t think so.”

Throwing down his own cards, Branch watched as the man’s smirk dropped when he realized he lost. 

His shocked look quickly turned into a look of anger as he pulled out a blade and pointed it at Branch. “You cheated!”

Branch gave an unimpressed look as he put the gold plate back in his crown and grabbed his drink. “1. I’m a pop troll, we don’t care about winning games. 2. I literally have no reason to cheat. You’re just a shitty loser.”  
  
Rolling his eyes as the man stood up, still pointing the dagger at him, Branch calmly finished his drink before slamming his cup down. Using his crown he looped it around the man’s hand and twisted it until he released the blade.

And now to make sure this idiot didn’t try starting a fight with him.  
  


“GROUP HUG!”

Quickly grabbing the bag of coins and buttons on the table, Branch ducked down as every troll in the bar turned around and went to hug the tourist without question.

Crawling past the crowd, the prince easily reached the door and crawled outside.

Only to face a pair of familiar glittery shoes.

Branch cringed as he looked up and saw the princess frowning down at him. He was busted.

“Branchifer.”

“...Poppifer.”

Princess Poppy watched as Branch got back on his feet, leaning in close enough to smell his breath. “Gosh darn it Branch, drinking first thing in the morning? Really?”  
  


Brushing off the dirt on his hands and knees, Branch rolled his eyes at the princess. “That’s none of your business Poppy.”

“Fine, be that way. Come on, we need to get ready.”

As Branch straightened himself up he stopped as he watched Poppy sit down on her litter seat and pat the open space next to her.  
  


“Nope, not happening. I’ll walk.”

Putting on her sweetest smile, Poppy made sure Branch could feel her eyes burning deep within his soul as she spoke. “You either sit next to me or I swear, my dear beloved Branch, that I will tie you down to this thing myself.”

After a tense stare down that only lasted a few moments, Branch found himself begrudgingly sitting next to the princess as they were carried off back to the castle. The prince, doing his best to tune out Poppy and the citizens singing their hearts out during the trip back.

Today was going to be just _great._

Back at the castle, King Peppy inspected the wedding cake that was just wheeled into the throne room. He hummed thoughtfully before turning to his advisor. “The cake is perfect, I’m sure Branch will love it… but did you have to make the little wedding figurine look so... grumpy?”

Chef glanced up at the cake figurine the king was talking about. The one made to look like the prince scowling as it held the hand of the other figurine. “If I can be honest your Highness, that’s the only expression your ‘son’ gave us to work with.”

That was fair. Branch scowled more often than not. Only a few people are blessed with his true happy smile during his rare good days. “Well if it’s not too much trouble, could you please try your best to make it look happy; I would appreciate it.”

“As you wish your majesty.” Bowing, royal advisor Chef left with the other kitchen workers as both Poppy and Branch entered the throne room.

Locking eyes with Chef for a moment, the prince gave her a quick dirty look as she smirked at him before they continued on their way.

As his children approached, King Peppy sat down at his throne. “Branch where in the world were you? Were you out drinking again?”

“Uuuh-”

Quickly jumping in, Poppy gave her best smile with her adorable eyes. “Of course not! You know how Branch is with the guards dad, if one gets on his nerves he’ll drive them nuts until they run out of the castle screaming.”

Peppy wasn’t sure if he should entirely believe that. “I’ll leave the subject alone for now, considering we have a long day ahead of us. You two go get ready. And Branch?”

Stopping from going out the door to get ready like Peppy requested, Branch turned to his legal guardian. “This is what you want right? You’re happy with being married?”  
  
No, not at all, Branch hasn’t even met his groom and frankly he didn’t want to get married for a freaking alliance. But ever since his grandma died, Peppy had taken him on as his responsibility. Dealing with his bullshit and bad attitude when he had his own royal duties and family to worry about. This marriage would get Branch out of the kingdom without having to try leaving on his own and worrying everyone sick. 

He cared a lot for the royal family, really he did, but being the angriest troll living in the happiest kingdom, and being judged by all the stuck up asshole nobles and rude visiting royals didn’t really make the prince feel like a prince.

Though it’s not like he can go live by himself without Peppy and Poppy worrying about him constantly, he could barely ditch the guards the king assigned to watch over him without having to hog tie them to get them off his back.

Branch didn’t like making them worry anyways...

If him living as a stranger’s husband in another castle kept Peppy and the royal family happy and satisfied over his safety, then maybe it was worth it. “Yeah, this is what I want.”  
  


Watching as his children walked away, Peppy sighed to himself. “Why do I have trouble truly believing that then?”

/

Deep in the forest, hidden from danger, a small village of little blue creatures greeted the new day and each other as they came out of their mushroom homes to gather for breakfast.

The smurfs are a kind and magical group of small creatures that live in peace, hiding away from people and dark forces that would search high and low for their rare powerful magic. All one hundred of their new younger generation of smurfs being raised by one wise smurf they called Papa Smurf.

Humming a little to himself, Papa Smurf walked towards where all the smurfs gathered for breakfast and started doing a headcount of all his smurflings, making sure everyone made it on time for the most important meal of the day.

“-Baker, Barber, Blacksmith, Brainy- Brainy?”

Confused by the empty seat where one of his more curious smurfling would sit, Papa smurf glanced around to see if he could locate him sitting somewhere else. Only to notice 3 more empty seats that belonged to Clumsy, Hefty, and Smurfette.

This was odd, they’re usually very punctual to breakfast.

Heading back towards the mushroom homes, Papa started by checking the closest one of the 4 missing smurfs homes, Smurfette’s.

Papa knocked on the door and waited for a moment, only being greeted by silence. “....Smurfette? Are you alright in there? Breakfast has already begun.”

Still only getting silence, Papa Smurf quietly opened the door to check to see if his smurfling was alright. Only to be met with an empty bed.

Getting suspicious, Papa quickly headed to the next house. Knocking on the door as a quick warning before opening it.

“Hefty!”

Seeing something under the covers he moved deeper into the room and yanked the blankets out of the way, only finding large round weights with a face doodled on it.

Papa quickly ran to the next house. “Brainy!”

Entering the home and removing the blankets, Papa was greeted by a much better made dummy out of Brainy’s belongings.

Now getting frustrated he quickly moved to the last house.

“Clumsy!”

He wasn’t impressed when he pulled the blankets away and discovered three apples laying in the bed. “Oh that’s not even convincing!”  
  


Coming to the conclusion that his smurflings snuck out of the village without his permission, again, Papa Smurf headed back to his own mushroom to collect supplies before going after them.

“When I find those four they will be grounded for-!”

Reaching his house, the elder smurf paused seeing a note he hadn’t noticed earlier pinned to his door. Papa Smurf removed it before reading.

“Dear Papa, if you have found this it means Smurfette, Hefty, Clumsy and I have missed breakfast and you realized we left the village. Rest assured we are safe, we just wish to attend the royal wedding happening in Dreamland that Smurfette insisted we go see. We promise to be careful and stay out of sight of the people there. We’ll be home soon. Signed, Brainy Smurf.

P.S. We borrowed Feathers, I hope you will not be too angry with us when we return.”

Papa Smurf huffed in frustration as he finished reading the letter.

He was unhappy with his smurflings, VERY unhappy. They snuck out, left home without permission, all to see a wedding.

They also took his bird, which was Papa’s fastest mode of transportation. If he tried going after them now it would take all day to travel by foot when they might be back by sundown.

He didn’t like this, but he had to have faith that his smurflings would make it back home safely by the end of the day. If they do not and he gets no word from them as for why they’re gone longer than expected, then he’ll go after them himself and bring them home.

For now, he just had to hope they’d be okay.

/

All four smurfs screamed in terror as Feathers flapped his wings frantically to get away from the battlefield they stumbled upon.

Gripping tightly to the bird, Brainy glared at Smurfette. “I told you not to ask for directions!”  
  


“I didn’t know those gnomes were going to war!”  
  


Quickly grabbing onto Clumsy who started to slip off Feather’s back, Hefty Smurf shot an irritated look at Brainy. “She wouldn’t have had to ask for directions if you didn’t get us lost!”

Looking down at the battle below them, Clumsy’s eyes widened. “Uh guys.”

“We weren’t lost! I knew where we were going!”  
  


“Guys.”

“You had us heading to Bergen Town! That was literally the opposite direction of where we were supposed to go!”

“GUYS! CADAPULT!”

His words finally getting the others attention, all four Smurfs screamed in terror as a giant flaming rock was flung into the air and right at them. Feathers quickly spinning out of the way to avoid getting hit, resulting in the small smurfs losing their grip on the bird and falling down towards the trees below.

As Hefty reached and grabbed Clumsy, Smurfette did the same, grabbing Brainy before they broke through the green of the trees below. The strongest Smurf reached out and grabbed onto a tree branch while Smurfette grabbed onto Clumsy before she and Brainy could plummet down any further.

The four of them tried catching their breath from the rush they just experienced. Clumsy looking down as the ground below them before looking up at Hefty. “Say Hefty, you’re not still scared of heights are you?”

Grunting, Hefty did his best not to look down as he attempted to pull the four of them onto the tree. “I was actually trying not to think about that. Thanks for the reminder bro.”

“Oh, forgot I said anything then.”

Finally pulling himself and the others safely up onto the tree, the strong smurf tried swallowing down his nasia from their nearly fatal fall and attempted to stay focused on the others. “Is everysmurf okay?”

As all of them confirmed they were okay, Brainy Smurf looked up and studied the sky. “I think Feathers got spooked away. I can’t see him.”

“There he is Brainy! He’s coming right for us!”

Turning around to see what Clumsy was talking about, the smart smurf adjusted his glasses as he squinted at what was flying towards them. “That doesn’t look like Feathers, it looks like-”

All four of them yelled in alarm as the bird that WAS NOT Feathers, scooped them up in a sake and started flying away.

“.... ‘It would be nice to see a wedding’, and ‘It’ll be just smurfy.’ Not like we’d stumble onto a battlefield, nearly fall to our deaths, and get captured by Gargamel’s bird who we haven’t seen in a long time. What are the odds of that?”

“Smurf up Brainy...”

/

“Honestly Branch, I really wish you’d stop this.”

Huffing, the prince sat as still as possible as Miss Frizz worked on cleaning him up, picking the twigs and dirt out of his hair as she brushed it out. “I wasn’t doing anything bad…”

The castle Nanny looked up at the mirror they were in front of and used the reflection to frown at Branch. “You call drowning your insides with alcohol not bad, young man?”

Branch refused to make eye contact with the reflection, he knew she was giving him that disappointed look and he hated that.

He hated letting people down.

Seeing how Branch refused to look at her, Miss. Frizz sighed as she put the comb she was using down and hugged Branch from behind. Waiting for him to look in the mirror and look at her reflection to continue. “Sweetie I just worry about you. I made a promise to your mother and grandmother to watch over you, and that’s exactly what I’m going to do, even if you don’t make it easy.”

Hesitating for a moment, Branch finally reached up and held onto his nanny’s arm. “I’m sorry…”

Giving him a gentle kiss on the side of his head, Frizz grabbed the comb and got back to work. “You can make it up to me by staying in touch after getting married. It’ll be so quiet here without my little thunder cloud.”

“With Poppy here, I highly doubt that.”

Frizz chuckled at Branch’s comment. “Oh hush, Just because you don’t sing doesn’t mean you’re not loud when you want to be heard… Are you sure you want to do this sweetie? It’s not too late. I could tell your groom to shoo the moment he shows up.”

A ghost of a smile formed on Branch’s face, amused by her words. “I’m sure. We could benefit from this alliance. Our kingdom is still recovering from the war 20 years ago, we’re the smallest out of the main 6 troll kingdoms. Extra help around here could help bring this place back to its former glory.”

It’ll also get him out of the castle, him finally being out of the way without Peppy, Poppy, and everyone who cares about him constantly worrying over him. Married he’ll be safe in a different kingdom, and maybe be useful for once instead of being the gloomy adopted prince.

He just wished he didn’t feel such dread as the time of the wedding got closer and closer.

He left that part unsaid though. Just wanting to enjoy this calm moment with Frizz. “I promise to write to you though. I’d miss you too much if I didn’t.”

Frizz smiled down at him as she continued to fix up the prince’s hair. The feeling of worry not going away.

/

After getting scolded and cleaned up by his nanny Miss Frizz, Branch walked through the castle halls dressed in silk robes before he changed into his wedding clothes.

Walking into the dining room where the reception party would be held, the prince glanced at all the presents lined up on the table at the end of the room. Glancing at some of the name tags.

He didn’t even know some of these people personally and yet they sent him presents as big as a horse. Probably just to kiss his ass like they do all the time to Peppy now that he’s possibly marrying someone important.

Not like Branch knew, his groom had arrived and he’s been avoiding meeting him as much as possible until he doesn’t have a choice, walking down the aisle to marry the guy.

As he was about to leave the room a small box caught the corner of his eye. Turning his head to get a better look, the box Branch thought he saw was gone.

Somewhat confused, the prince continued to leave until his foot came in contact with something. Looking down he saw a small gift wrapped box sitting by his feet.

“How the hell did you get down there?”

When Branch picked up the small box, he felt a chill go through him when his hand came in contact with the strange gift.

Something within him compelled him to open it.

Pulling at the ribbon, Branch pulled the lid off and froze when all the lights in the room suddenly went out.

_“Prince Branch.”_

A light began to shine from the box. From the light a shadow of a large ominous figure appeared on the walls and towered over Branch.

_“You are hereby cursed, from the deepest DEPTHS OF THE_ **_UNDERWORLD!_ ** _”_

“What the FUCK?!”

Branch dropped the box and stumbled backwards until his back came in contact with the dining room table. Blindly reaching behind himself, he grabbed whatever he could as a weapon, which ended up being a spoon, and readied himself to attack.  
  


“Oh but you look great though.”

As the lights mysteriously came back into the room, a figure stood before Branch.

Skin as black as night from his feet up to his waist, which faded to purple further up his body, stood a tall male with horns coming from his head of blue/green hair and a tail coming from behind.

“Nice to meet you, they call me Creek.”

_Thunk!_

Grunting in surprise, Creek rubbed his forehead where the spoon struck him. “OI! That was rude!”  
  


“GUARDS! GUARDS! A weird ghost guy is attacking and complimenting me-!”

Quickly rushing to the prince, Creek covered his mouth with his hand. “Sshh! Shut up! First of all, I’m not a ghost. Ghosts are nitwits that got murdered. I am a demon, your personal demon in fact. So you better get used to it because you are stuck with me for all eter-”

Glaring at Creek, Branch quickly grabbed his hand he was using to cover his mouth, grabbed the rest of his arm, and flipped Creek over his head, slamming him down onto the table behind him.

“nity…”

Rushing to one of the historical weapons displayed in the room, Branch grabbed the mace off the wall and let out a battle cry as he charged towards the demon.  
  


Eyes going wide at the prince coming at him, Creek quickly rolled off the table before the weapon could strike him. “Wait, wait, just take it easy!”

_WHAM!_

Branch stared in shock and somewhat horror at how the demon before him, despite getting hit in the face with a mace, straightened himself up and rubbed his cheek. “You sure pack a punch for a pop troll.”

Not backing down, Branch continued to swing his weapon at Creek who started stepping back to avoid getting hit.

“Look mate, how about we all just take a deep calm breath and-”

The prince didn’t give the demon a chance to finish that sentence, quickly kicking him square in the chest and sending Creek tumbling down the staircase he unknowingly was walking backwards towards.  
  


Satisfies as he watched the demon roll down the stairs uncontrollably, Branch turned to go put the mace back on the wall where it was hanging.

Only to freeze seeing roughed up Creek glaring at him in annoyance. “If you don’t calm down this will be a long forever.”

Staring for a moment, Branch finally sighed in defeat. “Great, getting married and being cursed all in the same day. That’s freaking perfect…. First question. Why are you naked?”

“Oh, do trolls not walk around naked anymore?”

The prince rolled his eyes as he put the mace back and started heading to his room. “Not since our ancestors were the size of squirrels. It just makes you a weirdo and I’m not having some naked demon following me everywhere, even if you lack certain... body parts. Let's get you some proper clothes before I interrogate you.”

/

Standing at the docks of the kingdom, Princess Poppy bounced on her heels excitedly as she waited for the wedding guests to arrive.

So far the Funk and Classical troll kingdoms have arrived for the wedding, Poppy giving lots of hugs to Trollzart and the Funk Royal family when they showed up the day before. She planned to do the same when Delta Dawn arrived with her people later before the wedding started.

Right now though, she was most excited to see one of her closest friends.  
  
Before her eyes, the water in the distance began to shift, forms starting to rise out of the blue ocean and into the fresh air. The princess now jumped in place excitedly, waiting until the figure in front came close enough for her to tackle hug.  
  


“YAY TROLLEX!! You came!!”

Hugging back tightly, Trollex, king of the tecno mertrolls, laughed at his friend’s excitement and gave her a peck on the cheek. “Of course I came! What kind of king would I be if I missed my little buddy’s wedding? Where is Branch anyways?”

Being put down by Trollex, Poppy started leading him and his royal guards towards the castle. “He’s busy getting ready but will be super glad to see you! In his own, Branchy way.”

That indeed was quite true, King Trollex being one of the few people Branch has been unable to scare away with his bad attitude over the years, earning a special place in the grumpy troll prince’s heart.

The young king, back when he was a prince, always looked forward to when his parents would bring him along to Dreamland to visit the royal family, teaching the then younger prince and princess to swim, making seashell jewelry with Poppy, and enjoying the peaceful quiet with Branch in the castle garden. 

Sure the last few years have been kinda rough. Branch picking up his drinking habit in the attempt to forget about his problems, some relationships getting strained, and now Branch is marrying someone he’s never even heard of, but King Trollex would always be there to support his closest friends even when life started getting difficult.

“So is Branch’s groom here yet? If so what’s he like?”

Poppy paused a little at Trollex’s question, trying to think of how to answer that.

Her first impression on Bash and his people was interesting. Bash was a tall Berginite, the distant cousin species of the Bergens. Sharing a few features with the Bergens like sharp teeth and claws, but looking more reptilian with their tails and fins on their heads. They were also much smaller compared to Bergens, Chef having to bend down going through doorways while the Berginites were around the same size as trolls.

He didn’t show much personality, his group of royal guards doing a lot of the talking and bragging about their awesome prince, occasionally looking back at him as if desperate for his approval over what they said.

The only one not bragging about Bash’s greatness was Archer, a small soldier that reminded the princess a bit of Branch with his sour look and quiet demeanor.

“He seems okay. I didn’t really get to talk with him before he had to rush off to get ready for the wedding himself. Now you guys can drop off the presents in the dining room and then we can go find Branch so you can give him a big hug-!”

Reaching said dining room, Poppy gasped at how the room was somewhat trashed. The neatly made table and decorations now a mess with the signs of a weapon being used in there. The big mace shaped dent in the table sticking out like a sore thumb.

“... And so I can give that grump such a scolding.”

/  
  
Sitting on his bed, now fully dressed in his wedding clothes, Branch had his back towards his closet as Creek raided it trying to find a good outfit he liked. “So you’re my personal demon? What, does that mean you do my bidding or something?”

From inside the closet the prince heard Creek scoff. “Yeah no. You know that little voice in the back of your head that tells you to do the right thing? I yell over it. I make you feel good about doing bad things.”

Unpleasant memories came to mind at the demon’s words, making Branch frown. “Oh, so you’re like a terrible friend.”

“Never said I was your friend. Now how do I look princey?”

Turning around, Branch cringed at the obnoxiously yellow pants Creek had managed to find in the pile of clothes he was gifted by the other kingdoms that he would never wear. “You willingly dress like a lemon?”

“Sure, it is after all what we feed children in hell. Why? Do you hate it?”

“Immensely.”

Creek smirked. “Then I’m keeping these on.”

About to make a rude comment back, Branch’s bedroom door swung open. “Branch you son of a baked biscuit! If you hated the decorations why didn’t you just tell me?!”

The prince jumped in alarm as Poppy marched in angrily, not giving him a chance to reply as she kept going. “I didn’t use glitter, I made sure everything was your favorite colors, green and tree bark brown, I got all of your favorite flowers and instead of saying something you take a mace to the dining room table?! What the heck?!”

“... Are you done?”

Taking a deep breath, Poppy let out a sigh. “Yes, Trollex is here too by the way.”

Glancing behind her, Branch saw Trollex waiting in the doorway. Getting up from his bed, he moved towards the king. “Hey Trollex. Good to see you.”

Smiling, King Trollex pulled the prince into a hug. “I missed you too buddy. But uh, care to explain what happened to the dining room? I’ve heard of pre wedding jitters but that seemed a bit extreme.”

Awkwardly patting Trollex’s back during the hug, Branch moved and pointed at Creek who was quietly watching the whole thing. “I was trying to get rid of a pest.”

“Rude, and you wonder why you got cursed in the first place.”

Smiling brightly at the new company, the princess walked over and gave a troll style hello by hugging him tightly. “Hi! I’m Poppy! Welcome to Dreamland and- I’m sorry did you just say cursed?”

Being frozen by the unexpected hug, Creek cleared his throat as he carefully removed the princess from himself. “Yes I did. My name is Creek, I’m a demon, and I’m here to make the prince make bad decisions and ruin his life.”

It got tensely quiet in the room as the three trolls stared at Creek from his brutal honesty.

Putting an arm protectively around Branch, Trollex whispered to him. “Is he serious?”

“Unfortunately.”

“So you don’t want him here at all? He’s not some weird bad influence friend to replace Barb?”

Creek perked up at the name as he pulled out an opened letter from his pants pocket. “Oh, is this the same Barb that sent you this? I saw the envelope sitting on your desk unopened, curiosity was killing me. Sorry not sorry.”

Brushing Trollex’s arm off, Branch marched over to Creek and snatched the letter from him, finally reading the letter he got in reply to his wedding invite he sent to an…. acquaintance.

Watching as Branch’s expression soured, Poppy put a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Branch? Is Barb able to make it?”  
  


Poppy got her answer as Branch ripped up the letter many times, taking the scraps and throwing them out his window.

Creek gave a small humm as he watched. “Well that answers that, Oh, how about we send her something rude back? I’ve got some suggestions, living in hell you hear a lot of perfect insults coming from the rather cranky residents as they’re being tortured.”

Moving to Branch to put a comforting hand on his shoulder, Trollex shot Creek an annoyed look before turning to Poppy. “Should we tell the king about this whole being cursed thing?”

The prince gave a scoff as he closed his window. “Sure, I go up to him before I walk down the aisle. ‘Hey Peppy by the way I got cursed by a demon trying to make me a bigger asshole than I already am and I might go to hell as a result.’ He’d have a stroke right there in the church.”  
  
Trollex opened his mouth to say more until they heard the magical flower from Branch and Poppy’s hug time bracelets go “ _Ding!_ ”, signalling what time it was. The wedding would be starting soon.

Taking a deep breath to calm his tense nerves, Branch headed for the door. “You guys better finish getting ready. I’m heading to the church.”

Trollex moved in front of Branch to make him stop, giving him a worried look. “Branch, are you sure you want to do this? It’s not to late if-”

The prince cut the tecno mertroll king off. “Why does everyone keep asking me that?! If I wasn’t sure, I wouldn’t be going through with it!”

Despite being snapped at, the young king replied calmly. “Because we know you would if you thought it would make everyone else happy…”

Branch didn’t reply right away. Staying quiet as he thought about Trollex’s words.

“ ….I want to go through with this. If you don’t want to watch me get married for an alliance then you don’t have to stay.”

Stunned by the prince’s cold words, Trollex didn’t stop him when he moved around him and left the room. Creek following him out with an entertained smirk. “Oh I can already tell this wedding is going to be a blast.”

With Branch gone, Poppy walked over to her mertroll friend and wrapped her arms around him in a comforting hug. “You know he doesn’t mean it right? He’s really glad you’re here for him.”

Trollex sighed sadly as he hugged her back. “Yeah… But I wish he’d consider himself for once…”

/

Waiting in one of the rooms in the church before the wedding started, Branch cracked the door open and peaked at all the guests.

Almost all the royal families were there. King Quincy and Queen Essence sitting with their sons Cooper and Darnell, Delta Dawn holding her niece Clampers so she wouldn’t attempt chewing on the seats, Trollzart sitting at the church piano, insisting he’d have the honor of playing beautiful music for the young prince’s wedding, and Trollex sitting with Miss. Frizz and Peppy while Poppy stood in the front of the church, being his maid of honor.

Even Poppy’s friends were there. The Snack pack sitting together as they all took turns playing with Guy’s new baby son Tiny who was giggling up a storm from all the attention.  
  


At the front of the church though, standing in front of the Great Troll Tree the building was built around, was his groom and future husband. Bash standing tall and looking proud. This was the first time the prince ever got a good look at him, the face he would be seeing for the rest of his life every single day.

God Branch really didn’t want to do this…

Behind him, Creek snooped around the room a bit, finding a bottle of wine and popping it open. “How long is this going to take? I’m not exactly a big fan of churches.”

Watching as the demon took a few big gulps of wine, Branch rolled his eyes. “That’s communal wine dumbass.”

Spitting out what he hasn’t swallowed yet, Creek wiped his mouth before grabbing a cup and pouring more wine into it. “You could probably use some of this.”  
  


“I really shouldn’t.”

“Moments when you really shouldn’t, are when you really should.”

Looking back at the crowd and his groom for a bit, Branch shut the door and took the cup, drinking what was inside before sitting down on the ground. “Drinking with a demon. Not exactly how I expected my wedding day to go. Though frankly I didn’t expect to get married at all. Not even for true love like my mother and father.”

Glancing up, Branch stared at the stone statue that was made in the memory of his late father Oak Brancherson, King Peppy’s dear friend. He’s heard so many amazing things about his father from Peppy, telling Branch when he was little about all the amazing heroic things he did in their youth.

The prince just wishes he had the chance to remember him before he passed.

Staring at the statue for a moment as well, Creek gave a small shrug. “Who needs to fall in love when you can party as much as you want afterwards?”  
  


“I hate parties…”

Creek rolled his eyes as he poured another cup for himself. “At least you don’t mind pity parties. Here’s to drowning out life’s problems.”

Humming in reply, Branch was about to take another drink before he heard someone clear his throat. Looking up Branch gasped and quickly stood up. “Peppy! Peppy hey! Hi, uh, this isn’t what it looks like.”  
  


King Peppy raised an eyebrow at the prince, carefully plucking the cup out of his hand and putting it down somewhere else. “Really? So you’re not drinking on your wedding day with- who is that?”

Branch glanced back at Creek still sitting on the floor, trying to think of a good answer. “Uh that’s Creek, he’s a, rock troll.”

“I beg your pardon-?”

_Kick!_

“Ow! I mean, rock on?”

Peppy studied Creek curiously. He doesn’t remember seeing Branch spending time with this rock troll, he would have thought he’d remember someone with purple skin. Trolls haven’t had such colorful skin in years except for their noses and ears. Though to be fair Branch never talked to him about anyone he spent time with so the king couldn’t have known how long Branch had known this guy.

“It’s lovely to meet you Creek. Now Branch, please, just try to stay away from the drinks today. If you’re going to marry this man you need to get to know him.”

Which was exactly what Branch wanted to avoid doing as much as possible, but looking into the king’s eyes kept the prince from saying that out loud. “Okay Peppy.”

Hearing Trollzart starting to play the wedding music, Peppy offered his arm to his adopted son. “Are you sure you’re ready for this Branch?”

No. He wasn’t ready as he took Peppy’s arm.

“I’m ready.”

/

Shifting uncomfortably in the cramped sack, Clumsy sighed in boredom. “Are we there yet?”

Huffing, Brainy gave Clumsy a tired annoyed look. “Clumsy there’s not an easy way to tell if we’re arriving at our destination in this thing. The only way to tell is if Monty lands.”

Suddenly the smurfs grunted when they came in contact with something hard and still. Smurfette blinking in surprise as she looks around. “You mean like right now?”  
  
Seeing light coming from the opening, Hefty Smurf realized Monty’s grip on the bag was now loosening as he rested. “You guys wait here, when I say so, make a break for it.”

The strong smurf carefully climbed to the bag’s opening and moved slowly as he crawled past the birds talons, hoping Monty wouldn’t notice and crush him. When he finally reached the opening and was hit with fresh air Hefty carefully looked up.  
  
Monty was looking around, as if he didn’t know what to do next. Taking this opportunity, Hefty quickly grabbed Monty’s foot.

_CHOMP!_

The bird cried out in pain, letting go of the bag long enough for Hefty to grab it. “Everysmurf out now!”

Quickly getting out, all four smurfs made a run for it before Monty could recover and chase after them.

As they ran Smurfette gasped at their surroundings.

  
They were in a tree, but this one was different. It was the biggest tree she’s ever seen, big enough to hold a Smurfvillage at least five times the size of their home.

What was really unique though, was all of the strange things dangling from the branches. They almost looked like flower pods, but they were strangely colored and very fuzzy looking.

They also had doors. Which means they were a type of shelter. “Guys follow me!”

Following Smurfette’s lead, Hefty quickly realized where she was leading them and charged forward. Jumping onto the pod the strong smurf kicked the door open. “Everyone in! Hurry!”

With everyone safely inside, Hefty shut the door and kept himself pressed against it. Everyone stayed silent as they heard Monty flapping around trying to locate them.

Brainy Smurf looked around their shelter, it being empty but looking well kept, as if someone came every day to take care of a house no one lived in. He put his hand on the wall and raised an eyebrow. “Is this place made entirely out of hair???”  
  


Looking around herself, Smurfette smiled at the home’s beauty. “Wow, I wonder if anyone used to live here?”

“It’s quite possible, but it’s hard to tell. The whole place looks well taken care of but there’s no evidence of anyone living here. Perhaps this tree is magic-”

All of them screamed in alarm as the pod started to shake, Monty managing to find them and was now pulling at the vine holding the small home up in the tree.

They then heard a snap and felt their stomachs drop as they began to fall.

/

Welp, here he was. Standing at the front of the church, in front of the Great troll tree, Poppy by his side as his hands are being held by his groom who was smiling at him, showing off his sharp fangs.  
  


“-Do you, prince Bash, take this man to be your husband?”

Bash nodded. “I do.”

“And do you, prince Branch, take this man to be your husband?”

Looking back at the crowd, Branch looked at the people who raised him and who he grew up with.  
  


The snack pack was curiously watching. Trollex, Miss. Frizz, and Peppy looking at him in concern. Poppy standing next to him, patiently waiting and ready to support him in any choice he made.

  
“I-”

The prince was cut off when they heard screeching from above. Everyone looked up at the tree in confusion as the noise kept going. Animals normally didn’t fight in the troll tree, the magic having a calming effect on the wildlife.

Peppy recognized that sound and turned to the castle wizard, frowning at him. “Gargamel, isn’t that your bird?”

Sitting next to Gargamel, Chef growled at him in annoyance. “Shut that thing up before it ruins the whole wedding!”

“Yes yes of course, my most deepest apologies.”

As Gargamel attempted to stand, something rolled down the trunk of the tree and onto the church floor, before coming to a stop.

Pushing the pod door open, Hefty carefully pulled himself up, still dizzy from their tumble down the tree thanks to the bird. “Ooooh that wasn’t smurfy. You guys o-kay….”

Hefty froze when his dizziness went away, having his gaze locked with prince Branch who was staring at him in shock and confusion.

As the others climbed out to see what Hefty was looking at now that their dizziness went away, they all froze as well, seeing all the people there staring at them.

Clumsy was the first to break the silence. “Think they noticed us?”


	2. Chapter 2

The silence that was within the church, everyone stunned by the little creatures that crashed the wedding, was finally broken by one of the Berginite guards. “What the hell are those things?”

Ducking down a little behind Chef so the Smurfs wouldn’t see him, Gargamel grabbed the large woman’s arm and whispered. “I need those Smurfs! They could be the ticket to everything we need!”

Intrigued by this statement, Chef stood up and pointed accusingly at the four in the middle of the church. “Guards! Catch those Smurfs for interrupting the royal wedding!”

Seeing the large guards coming at them, Hefty snapped out of staring at the prince and turned to the others. “Smurfintine formation! Go!”

As the four Smurfs took off and started running in different directions to make it harder for them to catch, the crowd started to act up as the little mysterious creatures ran between their feet and the guards still trying to reach them.

Watching as Peppy quickly tried calming the situation down with the help of the other royals, Branch looked down when he felt Bash let go of his hands. The other prince distracted as he ordered his people to catch those, smurfs apparently, as well.

Branch let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, glad that him saying the accursed “I do” got pushed back, even just a little bit.

He was taken by surprise though when Poppy took his arm and started leading him away. “Come on!”

  
  
“What? Poppy what are you doing???”   
  


Rushing to the back door, Poppy tried to open it only for it to be locked. Looking around, she smiled when her eyes landed on the window and went over to open it instead. Branch’s eyes went wide as he watched the princess start climbing out. “Poppy are you nuts?! It's a two story drop from that window!”

Poppy smirked at him as she reached under the floof of her big poofy dress and pulled out one of Branch’s grappling hooks. “Then it’s a good thing I raided your room and had Satin and Chenille put secret pockets in this dress! Now let’s go!”

Watching Poppy climb down, Branch looked back at the panicking crowd. Catching the sight of his groom smiling, almost wickedly as he watched everyone freak out and his guards pushing the guests around trying to reach the smurfs first.

It was like he was enjoying this, and he didn’t even notice his future husband isn’t by his side anymore.

Scowling at him, Branch followed Poppy’s lead and climbed out the window and down the rope of the grappling hook.

Leaning on the wall outside the church while smoking, Creek watched as Branch finally made it down onto the ground. “So, how did it go?”

The prince was about to tell him to shut the fuck up, when he heard something from above and looked up in time for something to smack flat onto his face.

Sitting up a little, Clumsy shook his head and moved his hat away from his eyes. Blinking a few times when he realized he was looking into the glaring eyes of the prince. “.... Congratulations?”

“Gee, thanks.”

Looking up too, the princess grabbed the edge of her dress and held it to make a soft landing for the other smurfs that jumped down too. “Oh my gosh! Are you guys okay?!”

As Poppy got groaned replies to confirm they were okay, Branch carefully pulled the small blue smurf off his face and looked back up, seeing his groom and the guards looking down at them. “Great, now what?”

Scooping up the smurfs in her arms, the princess looked around until she spotted a cart full of hay nearby. She smiled as an idea came to mind.

“Anyone up for a hayride?”

/

“I’m sorry, your highness, but your children ran away during the chaos.”

King Peppy sat slouched over in his seat as his dear friend Frizz patted his back, him rubbing his head as he felt a headache coming on. “I noticed that Chef, what I’d like to know is WHY?”   
  
By this point everyone has calmed down. With the smurfs gone and the crowd under control, Peppy noticed both Branch and Poppy have vanished too. The grappling hook was still dangling from the window.

The king quickly dismissed everyone but the royal families and his employees until this could all be sorted out. Today has become a disaster. 

Looking out the window the prince and princess escaped from, Prince Cooper turned towards the other royals. “Maybe he just got cold feet?”

Prince Darnell quickly elbowed his twin brother and gestured to Bash, who was giving them an unimpressed look.

  
  
“Oh, uh, no offence man.”

Giving a shrug to the twin princes, Prince Bash walked over to king Peppy. “With your permission sir, may I try going after my groom and attempt talking to him so we can sort this out? You and the other royal families will have your hands full trying to keep your people settled until your children return and with those smurfs possibly still running around and causing another uproar.”

The king thought it over before sighing. He had no reason to doubt Bash, and he might just want to know as much as him why Branch ran off. Standing up, he gave a stern look to Bash. “Please be careful. I want all of you back safely. Do you understand?”

“Yes King Peppy.”

A bit further from the group, Trollex finished scolding his guards for playing in the part of putting the citizens attending the wedding into such a panic and was now running his fingers through his glowing sea anemone like hair.

His dads made ruling a kingdom and leading their people look so much easier than this…

In the background he overheard Bash give orders to his guards. Out of Peppy’s hearing range but not from Trollex’s sensitive fin like ears.

“Alright guys, time to catch my blushing bride. This should be fun.”

Trollex spun around and watched as Bash left the church to go after the prince and princess.

If Branch didn’t kick this guy’s ass after seeing his true colors Trollex might have to do it himself.

/

“I knew it. I KNEW you didn’t want to get married!”

“Yeah I think we’ve already covered that Poppy, thanks.”

After paying the person who owned the cart so they could borrow it, Poppy steered the horse as they rode around town so she and Branch could talk.

Or more like Poppy annoyed the hell out of Branch until he finally told the truth.  _ “Okay I don’t want to marry some random asshole! Happy now?!” _

Now on the prince’s head, all of them properly introducing each other during the ride, Hefty looked down at Branch. “If you didn’t want to marry him then why were you going to?”

Branch rolled his eyes as he slouched in his seat. “Maybe because I would have been useful for an alliance instead of just being the adopted pity prince of the happiest kingdom.”

Creek blew out the last of the smoke in his lungs, not caring how Clumsy smurf on his head coughed or how Brainy in his lap glared at him before flicking away what was left of his cigarette. “Too bad you blew that too. Now you’ll be the pity prince with commitment issues.”

Poppy gave Creek an annoyed look before turning to Branch. “Don’t listen to him Branch, you’re not-”

Poppy screamed in alarm when something flew past her face, spooking the horse and making it start running in terror.

Gripping his seat tightly, Branch turned his head to see that they were being chased by Bash and his guard who were firing arrows at them. “What the hell?! Is he trying to kill us?! Poppy you need to steer us somewhere less populated! Someone might get hurt!”

“On it!”

Gripping the harness tightly, the princess pulled on it tightly forcing the horse to go where she wanted it to go. Towards the kingdom gates where citizens wouldn’t be hanging around and less likely to get hurt.

Hanging on tightly to Creek’s horns as they traveled out of the kingdom, Clumsy sniffed the air and looked down at the demon. “You’re smoking again? Now???”

“What the bloody hell are you-”

Creek stopped when he caught the scent of what Clumsy was smelling. Turning, the demon watched as a flaming arrow that had hit the cart was setting the hay on fire. “Oh. Are trolls and smurfs fireproof?”

Feeling the heat on their backs, Branch and Poppy looked and screamed at the growing flames reaching out for them. Acting on instinct, Branch pushed all of them off before the cart was engulfed in fire. Sending all of them tumbling down a hill.

When they all finally came to a stop Creek groaned as he sat up, both Clumsy and Brainy holding on tightly to his upper body from the fall. “What is with you bloody trolls and constantly trying to kill me by shoving me down things?!”

Choosing to ignore him, Branch looked down at Poppy who he pulled protectively against his chest so she wouldn’t get hurt. “You okay?”

The princess nodded as she looked down at Smurfette held safely in her arms. “Are you okay too?”

Smurfette nodded, blushing as she looked up at the beautiful princess. “Yes, I’m okay. Oh but your beautiful dress is ruined!”

Poppy looked down at her now dirty and ripped up dress and shrugged. “I can always get a new one.”

Relieved that Poppy was okay, the prince looked at Hefty who he grabbed earlier and held him against his chest as well as they fell. “Are you okay tough guy?”

Still hanging on tightly to the prince’s ripped clothes, Hefty smiled up at him for showing concern before looking back up at where they fell from. “I’m fine but I think we need to go.”

Following Hefty’s line of sight, Branch cursed under his breath seeing Bash and his guards trying to make their way down to them. He quickly got himself and Poppy up to their feet. “Come on, we can hide in the woods!”

Taking off, Branch made sure to move through parts of the woods to make it difficult for the group's horses to follow until he found a good hiding spot and had all of them duck down in it.   


  
Hearing Bash and his guards go right past them, after a few moments of silence Branch checked and sighed seeing the coast was clear. “I can’t believe I almost married that  jackass.”   


“Yeah, you got such a lovely taste in romantic interests.”

Poppy quickly planted her hands firmly against Branch’s chest before he could try strangling the demon out of anger. “Okay! Okay, everyone just calm down. We need to figure out what to do next. No way is Branch marrying that jerk now and we need to get back to my dad to tell him that.”   


  
Getting out of their hiding spot, Branch went over to the tracks left by the horses and studied them. “That might not work. From the looks of these tracks a few of Bash’s guards doubled back. If we go home they might be waiting for us and stop us from reaching Peppy.”

Jumping down onto the ground, Hefty turned to Branch and flexed his muscles. “I’d like to see those jerks try! They picked the wrong day to mess with a prince and princess now that Hefty Smurf is here!”   


  
Poppy giggled a little as Branch raised an eyebrow at the small smurf. Bending down she picked Hefty up and smiled at him. “That’s sweet of you Hefty but we’d really hate for you to get hurt as a result. Maybe there’s a more peaceful option.”

Clumsy hummed thoughtfully as he still held tightly onto Creek’s arm. “Maybe Papa’s friend the Wish Master can help?”

Climbing up to the demon’s shoulder, Brainy reached down and helped Clumsy up. “The Wish Master? Papa never said anything about a Wish Master before.”

“Well you know how secretive Papa can be sometimes. I heard him mention one day that he was going to the mountains to see the Wish Master for some help. Maybe he can help us too?”

Branch and Poppy looked at each other in consideration. Poppy grinning brightly as she already made up her mind. “That settles it! We’re off to the mountains to ask the Wish Master for help!!”

Handing Hefty back to Branch. Poppy carefully placed Smurfette on her shoulder as she started marching forward while singing. “ _ ~Hey! I’m not giving up today! Cause there’s nothing getting in my way! And if you knock, knock me over, I, WILL, GET BACK UP AGAIN!~” _

As the rest of the group watched her go, Hefty chuckled a little as he looked at the prince. “Is she always this optimistic?”

Branch huffed a little, almost looking fond and annoyed at the same time watching the princess go. “Yeah. Blind optimism tends to lead to interesting situations. Like how she’s going THE WRONG WAY! Poppy pay attention! You’re about to walk into poison ivy!”

/

By the time night fell, the group decided to stop until morning. Branch setting up a campfire as the others chatted.

Playing with her mandolin, Branch being utterly baffled with how Poppy managed to hide it in her dress and how it hadn’t been destroyed from their fall, the princess smiled as she looked at Smurfette. “So you guys live in cute little mushroom houses deep in the middle of nowhere? And you came out of hiding just for a wedding?”

Reading one of the books Brainy packed for the trip, he nodded. “Yup, never expected for us to be helping the runaway groom though who almost married a guy who’s a few smurfberries short of a smurfberry pie.”

Branch grumbled bitterly as he used a long stick to poke at the fire. Hefty smurf sat next to him and frowned at his unhappy expression. “Well you know what? The prince deserves someone a lot better than a jerk. You’re royalty, and royalty should live happily ever after. Not hiding in the woods.”

Glancing down at Hefty, Branch was a little surprised by his kind words considering they met not too long ago. “Thanks, but I’m not a real prince. King Peppy just adopted me. That and happily ever after is a load of crap.”

Creek laughed a little as he stared up at the night sky. “Keep talking like that and you might as well be a demon yourself Mr. Doom-and-Gloom”   


Ignoring how Branch flipped Creek off, the smart smurf looked at the demon curiously. “So you’re a real demon? As in you came from down below?”

“That’s right.”

“What’s it like???”

Taken by surprise by the little blue creature's enthusiasm, Creek gave a sharp toothy grin as he rolled onto his stomach and looked down at the smurf. “Well aren’t you adorably curious. Let's see it’s hot, full of fire, and a lot of people are screaming their heads off.”

The prince scoffed. “So exactly like the rock troll kingdom?”

Stopping at playing her mandolin, the princess pouted at the troll next to her. “Branch come on, stop being such a grouch. Maybe if you sing with us a little to help you relax-”

“Poppy, you know that I don’t sing, and I don’t relax! This is the way that I am, and I LIKE IT!”

Everyone stayed quiet as the prince laid down and turned his backs to them. Poppy, being used to this, was undeterred. In fact, she smirked as she continued to play her mandolin. Making Branch turn to look at her confused.

_ “Hello darkness my old friend. _

_ I’ve come to talk with you again” _

As the smurfs and Creek watched her with entertained smiles while she sang with the things in the forest joining her in her song, Branch sat up and watched unimpressed.

“ _ Because a vision softly creeping _

_ Left its seeds while I was sleeping _

_ And the vision, that was planted in my brain _

_ Still remains _

_ Within the sound, of silence~” _

When she finished, she smiled somewhat smugly as Branch stood up and approached her with his hands out. “May I?”

Eyeing him suspiciously, she carefully handed her mandolin to Branch.

Who threw it in the fire before going back to laying down on the ground.

Creek busted out laughing as the smurfs gasped in shock at the prince’s actions, the princess not at all looking surprised by what just happened. Hefty glared at Branch’s back. “Not cool, Branch!”

Brainy Smurf frowned as he pointed at the strong smurf accusingly. “You did the same thing with my smurf scout manual you hypocrite!”

The rest of the group continued to exchange small talk until they decided to go to sleep as well. After Creek said something about appearing in their dreams as a laughing skull everyone went quiet as they settled down and drifted off to sleep.   


Turning around to his other side quietly, Branch watched as Poppy slept. The smurfs using her dress as a bed as they slept peacefully against the warm princess who, normally dreamed with a smile on her face, had a slight frown.

Maybe he shouldn’t have thrown her mandolin in the fire. Just because his day was shit doesn’t mean he had to make it worse for her. Why did he have to be such a jackass?

Slowly stretching out his arm, Branch stopped before he could make contact with Poppy’s hand. He stared for a moment before quietly sighing and pulling back, closing his eyes as well.

Unknown to the prince, Hefty cracked an eye open and watched the whole thing. Watching when the adopted prince reached out to his honorary sister before pulling back the last second.

The smurf smiled a little before closing his eyes and going back to sleep, concluding that the prince isn’t as rude as he acts, showing that he cares is just harder on him.

/

Night had rolled around, and still no sign of his children. King Peppy was worried sick.

Why weren’t they home yet?

Were they hurt?

Were they scared?

Was all of this a mistake?

When Chef first brought up the alliance, Peppy planned on turning the idea down. They didn’t desperately need ties with this kingdom, and he wasn’t about to marry off his adopted son.

He was surprised though when Branch came up to him later that night asking to do it. Many times Peppy and Miss. Frizz asked him if he was sure he wanted to do this, Branch holding strong and saying he did.

Now more than ever did he doubt that. This not being the first time Branch had refused to tell Peppy the truth over how he felt. It also not being the first that Branch would take off to avoid his problems and worry everyone sick.

But Poppy taking off too was a first though, that he wasn’t expecting.

When his children return home, hopefully soon and safely, Peppy would have a serious talk with them over this whole mess of a wedding.

Sighing, the king blew out his bedside candle and laid down in his empty bed. He looked over at the empty side and smiled sadly. “Goodnight my queen.”

King Peppy doubted he’d get any sleep tonight.

/

“Branch, Branch, Branch, Branch. BRANCH WAKE UP!”

Branch groaned as he sat up, hating it when Poppy woke him up like that. Rubbing his tired eyes he asked. “What? What’s wrong-”

He cut himself off as he started down at white shoes and looked up to see a, now taller than him, Hefty Smurf smiling down at him. “Morning Branch! How do we look?”

Staring for a few moments, convinced that this wasn’t real, he directed his attention to the demon nearby. “I thought you said you were going to be some kind of skull in our nightmares or something, why make Hefty tall and attractive?”

Everyone started snickering and laughing behind their hands. Hefty smiling brightened at Branch’s words. “You think I’m attractive?”

Confused, Branch looked back at Creek who was just smiling at him with a big, evil grin.

Oh, this wasn’t a dream. He just said that out loud to everyone. 

Blushing hard, the prince quickly got to his feet. “I thought Creek- he said- SHUT UP! How the hell are you guys this big?!”

Brainy Smurf smiled as he held up his also bigger book, tapping the cover. “I grabbed this out of Papa Smurfs lab before leaving. Being this size helps protect us from predators and makes traveling way easier.”

Looking Brainy over, rather than the book, Creek hummed, “Smart and cute,” then chuckled when Brainy’s eyes went wide and his face darkened.

The princess giggles and lightly elbowed Branch, “It’s a really good thing you didn’t get married huh?”

His face getting hotter by the second, the prince glared daggers at the princess. “Shut, up. If anyone brings this up again they’re spending a night in the dungeon!”   


Rolling her eyes, the princess crossed her arms as she looked at her adopted sibling unimpressed. “Branch, we don’t have that kind of authorization yet.”

“I don’t care. Lets just hurry up and get to the mountain to find this damn wish master.”

Clearing his throat, Creek walked over to the prince and spun him around. Branch now seeing the wood and rope elevator behind them that would take them to the top of the mountain.   


“Oh…”   


With everyone on the elevator, Hefty and Branch worked together to get them to the top, Branch refusing to look at Hefty the whole time and focused on getting to the top of the mountain. Finally at the top, they all exited the elevator and went towards the large building.

Inside, they looked around until they found a man meditating in front of a pool.

What made everyone stop for a moment though, was how this man looked like he was made of clouds, and how he only had socks on…

Stepping forward, Poppy cleared her throat, catching the Cloud Guy’s attention. “Hello there, how may I help you?”

“Hi, are you the Wish Master?”

Cloud Guy raised an eyebrow at the princess. “Wish master, Oh nonono, I am no wish master, I am  **THE WASH MASTER-** **_MASTER- master_ ** _ -master. _ ”

Eyes going wide, Branch looked around the room full of wet clothing as the small bit of hope within him shriveled up while Cloud Guy continued explaining. “Everyone comes to me to clean their clothes, being made of clouds I have an endless supply of water to clean with.”

The rest of the group directed their attention to Clumsy, who was looking rather sheepish. “Oh, guess that explains why Papa had a bag of my dirty clothes when he left to go find this guy...”

Groaning in frustration, the prince moved to kick the wall beside them in anger. Barely noticing when Cloud Guy got up and started walking over to him. “Wow there Dumpy Diapers, someone could use some cheering up. How about a hi-five?”

Poppy quickly stopped Branch from reaching for one of his emergency knives he had tucked away in his shoes and put a comforting hand on his back.

“Hey, it’s okay, we can still look for another option! You’re not going to marry that butthead Bash.”

“Oh really?”

Everyone gasped as they spun around and saw Bash and his group come in through the door on the backs of their horses. Bash smiled smugly as Branch glared at him. “Come now Branch, we’re about to be husbands, can’t we talk about this?”

“You shot flaming arrows at us, so I’m gonna say, NO.”

Grabbing the princess’s hand Branch made a run for it with the others while Bash and his guards chased after them.

Sneaking through the halls until they reached the front doors, Branch made sure everyone got out safely before firmly shutting the doors. Hefty slipped a shovel through the handles to hold Bash back and buy them time.

“Uh, oh. Branch?”

Branch directed his attention to Poppy, who was pointing at the elevator where Archer and the other guards were waiting. He cursed under his breath as the door next to them started shaking from the people inside trying to get out.

All of them began to back away slowly as the berginites started approaching, one guard removing the shovel from the doors and setting Bash and the rest free. 

Climbing off his horse Bash started to approach the trolls and smurfs. He eyed the blue creatures curiously. “Wow, you guys were busy while playing runaway bride.”

Before Branch could say anything, he was actually surprised when Poppy spoke first. “HEY! First of all, Branch isn’t a bride! He is your GROOM! Second of all you don’t go chasing down your run away groom shooting ARROWS at him! I swear Prince Bash the moment we get home when my father hears about this the wedding will be-”

The princess’s words shifted into a scream, as her foot didn’t come in contact with dirt when she took a step back, but air. Branch’s eyes went wide in horror. “POPPY!”

The prince and Smurfette reached for the princess, the fragile cliff edge crumbling under their weight as the other three smurfs attempted to stop them from falling. Clumsy reaching out and managing to grab the, unwilling to help, demon by the tail and unintentionally drag him with them as they all fell to their doom.

Rushing to the edge, Bash and Archer looked down at the ground below, unable to see the people who just fell.

“... Well all of this was a bust.”

Archer looked up at Bash, appalled by his words. “Seriously? You just got a group of people killed! A prince and a princess for that matter! How the heck are we going to tell the king that both his kids and the heir to the throne are dead?!”

The prince just shrugged as he went back to his horse. “I don’t know, That they were eaten by a Greygon or something before we could find them? Still stinks that we lost our only easy ticket to the wildest party ever.”

Archer shot Bash a dirty look before looking back down. Still unable to see a thing, but there was no way they survived a fall like that.

Sighing, Archer followed his group as they went back down the mountain.

/

Lower down the mountain, in a blind spot hidden by the cliff, Branch’s arms trembled as he held on for dear life to a branch growing out of the stone wall. “It’s a good thing you smurfs can still shrink too.”

Hefty refused to look down as he hung on tightly to the prince’s shirt. Him and the others back down to their natural size. “You’re telling me…”

Hanging onto Branch’s arm, Poppy made sure Smurfette was holding onto her dress tightly as she looked around trying to find a way to get them out of this situation. “Okay everyone, just stay calm. Branch, whatever you do don’t let go-”   


“Why the FUCK would I let go?!?!”

“-Sorry. Creek you’re magic right?! Can’t you get us out of this?!”

Holding onto Branch’s other arm, Creek stopped glaring at Clumsy who was still holding onto his tail and smiled at the princess in amusement. “Now why in the world would I want to do that princess? I’m the immortal one, it’s you lot that is screwed.”

From inside Creek’s pocket, Brainy smurf spoke up. “You can still feel pain though right?”

“... Yeah, why?”

The smart smurf hummed as he looked down. “Calculating from this height, a fall from up here may kill all of us, but you’d be in excruciating pain for smurf knows how long. Also from my understanding, you barely had any influence on Branch, who’s to say if he dies now he’ll go to hell?”

Well shit. The little blue creature made some good points Creek couldn’t really ignore. “Bloody blue smartass, you’re lucky you’re cute.”

In the blink of an eye, they were all engulfed in darkness. Before anyone could freak out they were back in the light with their feet on the ground.

Unfortunately, they couldn’t celebrate their survival as they were surrounded by Bash’s surprised guards.

“You’ve got to be fucking shitting me.”

/

The trip back to Dreamland was anything but smooth.

At least Branch made sure it was.

He had punched at least three Berginites when they tried tying him and Poppy up, the guards way too afraid of Creek to even attempt approaching him with rope. Things only began to calm down when Poppy gave her word that they won’t run.

Bash also made the mistake of trying to ride back to the kingdom with Branch sitting behind him. A nice bump on the back of his noggin where the troll prince headbutted him before he decided walking was safer and let the princess take his place sitting on the horses back while he led the animal.   


The Berginites were also not allowed to touch the smurfs. The little blue creatures stayed safely tucked away in the prince and princess’ pockets so the guards and Bash wouldn’t attempt to touch them.

After they finally arrived back home and past the castle gates, Branch got off the horse and helped Poppy down before the two of them got crushed in a hug by the king. “OH THANK GOODNESS! Are you two okay?! I was so worried!!”

From inside the prince’s pockets Clumsy squeaked. “Can’t, breath!”

King Peppy let go and looked surprised when he saw the little smurfs gasping for air after nearly being smothered. “Oh dear! I am so sorry, I had no idea you little ones were there.”

Carefully taking Clumsy and Hefty out of his pockets and handing them to Poppy, Branch turned to the king. “Peppy I am so, sorry. I didn’t want any of this to happen.”

Letting out a sigh, Peppy turned to Branch and looked him firmly in the eyes. “What happened Branch? I want to know why you two took off. I asked you so many times if you wanted to marry or not.”

Before he could answer the king’s question, his voice froze in his throat when he felt a large hand rest on his shoulder and grip it tightly, slightly digging into his shoulder with the fingernails. Branch looked up to see Chef smiling while looking down at him with those blood red eyes.

“Don’t be too harsh on him, sire. I’m sure he didn’t mean to cause you such worry, nearly destroying your alliance and risking war with another kingdom by running off. I’m sure it was just a case of cold feet and needing to get rid of some extra energy before following through with the plan that is best for everyone.”

Her smile grew as her grip on his shoulder tightened. “Isn’t that right, your highness?”

He wanted to object, he wanted to say no. But those eyes looking into Branch’s very soul made him swallow back anything he wanted to say, make him rethink yesterday’s events.

It was kinda shitty of him to run off like that. For all they know the Berginites might not take his rejection well and take it out on the whole kingdom. The pop trolls can’t take another war.

He can’t be selfish. Everyone deserves to be happy even if he can’t be.   


“Right… I’m sorry. I’ll go through with the wedding this time.”

Poppy and the smurfs jaws dropped at this. After everything that just happened, Branch suddenly wants to get married?!   


King Peppy wasn’t sure he should believe this either, but didn’t have the chance to speak when Chef let go of Branch’s shoulder and rubbed her hands together. “Excellent! We managed to save most of the food from the day before and everything is still all set so we can get the wedding started later today. Now for the other matter at hand.”

The large Bergen turned to the princess, who was holding all the smurfs. “I’ve heard very interesting things about you from the castle wizard. Oh Gargamel?”

The smurfs gasped as the name, watching as the said wizard approached with a devilish smile. Hearing the rather alarmed gasps made Poppy look at the little smurfs curiously. “Do you four know him?”

Gargamel jumped in right away, keeping his eyes locked with the smurfs. “No, I’m just well known where I used to live. Before I was graciously hired by the kind and understanding king Peppy, I studied the smurfs and their magic. These mysterious creatures have many magical  _ secrets _ .”

As he said that Gargamel looked straight at Smurfette who glared back at him. She and the boys knew exactly what he was insinuating.

If they outed him he’d blab to their new friends that she’s not a traditionally, born smurf.

Looking away from the smurfs the old wizard approached the king. “Your highness, with these smurfs, it could help you achieve what you’ve been after for many many years.”

The king’s eyes went wide at Gargamel’s words. Hope sparking in the man’s chest as he faced the smurfs his daughter was holding and bowed. “Please, I ask you to help and lend your magical gifts to this kingdom. I offer you four your own rooms in the castle, food, and free range to explore the kingdom as much as you desire.”

Not expecting such an offer, the smurfs looked at each other then up at the princess who looked just as surprised as them. Hefty looked over to where Branch was, only to see him walking off towards the castle without saying a word to anyone.

The strong smurf frowned then looked at the king in determination.

“We’ll do it.”

Brainy Smurf huffed. “Papa Smurf is going to love this…”

/

Inside the castle, Satin and Chenille worked on fixing up the prince and princess’ clothes as Guy worked his makeover magic on them. Poppy frowning as Guy put glittery make-up on her. “Branch, why do you want to marry that butt? You cussed him out the whole way back and probably gave him a concussion by headbutting him!”

Sitting on the other side of the room, Branch was bouncing baby Tiny Diamond on his knee after making it very clear to Guy he was still firm on his no glitter or make-up policy. “Well, Bergens have weird, and a little barbaric ways of handling things. Maybe that’s just normal for the Berginites?”

“By shooting arrows at us?! Sure when Gristle was still a prince he was kinda, well, not nice when we were growing up, but he never shot arrows at us when he was upset over something!”

In the room, King Trollex was sitting next to Branch. Horrified by what he just heard. “You cannot marry this man, Branch. He seemed like he was looking forward to hunting you down like prey!”

Guy grimaced a little hearing that part. “Yeeeaaah, got to agree with them there Branch. Your groom sounds like a butt.”

The prince shot a cold glare to the glitter freckled troll doing the princess’ make-up. “No one asked you and you weren’t there.”

“But we were.”

Coming out of the back room, the Smurfs were now dressed in new clothes. Their white pants and dress getting dirty from their trip, the only thing they kept were their hats.

Hefty was now wearing brown pants, brown boots, and a dark blue short sleeved top so his tattoo was still visible.

Clumsy was now wearing baggy tan pants with black shoes you could barely see peeking out from the bottom of the pants, and had on a baggy white shirt as well.

Brainy was now wearing dark brown pants, nice looking black shoes, and a nice buttoned up red vest over a long sleeved white shirt.

Smurfette was now wearing a beautiful dress that was white at the top, and the skirt of the dress being pink.

The strong Smurf sat down next to Branch with a concerned look. “Branch, come on. We were running from him all day yesterday. Why would you want to marry him now?”

Standing up, Branch held Tiny in his arms as he paced around, trying to ignore as the baby troll tried grabbing at his large ears. “Because I was being a selfish idiot! This is good for the kingdom! This is good for our people!”

Poppy stood up as well and marched over to Branch. “The people will be fine without this marriage!”

“Even if it means another war?”

Freezing under the prince’s glare, the princess hesitated to find the right words. “... We could-”

She didn’t get the chance to continue as the prince cut her off. “Berginites are cousins to Bergens, what if they teamed up?”

“They wouldn’t-”

“You don’t know that.”

The Smurfs were confused by the tense silence that filled the room. The quiet only being broken when Creek spoke up. “Looks like Asshole prince is marrying Dickhead prince then after all. What fun!”

Looking completely done with this current situation the prince marched over and caught the demon by surprise when handing him Guy’s baby son. “Here, why don’t you hold him? He’s making “The face” so have fun with that.”

Everyone watching as Branch marched out of the room, the demon barely noticed though, his focus on the strange little thing in his hands. As he wondered what “The face” was supposed to mean a rather strong odor came from Tiny. 

Oh, that’s what “The face” meant. 

Creek looked around the room in panic while holding the baby at arm’s length. “And what am I supposed to do with this?! Feed it a lemon?!”

Seeing Guy’s slightly worried expression over what Creek said, Brainy quickly stepped in. “First of all no, this isn’t hell and this baby barely has teeth.”

The smart smurf scooped Tiny out of Creek’s arms and looked around, grabbing the baby supply bag Guy had in the room. “ Second of all he just needs to be cleaned and changed… Do you want me to teach you how?”

“...I must admit that I am curious.”

As the two went to the other side of the room to change Tiny for Guy, Smurfette turned to the princess. “Poppy, may I ask what war you guys are talking about?”

All the trolls cringed a little at the question, Trollex speaking up. “I can tell it if you don’t want to Poppy.”

Opening one of the desk drawers in the room, the princess pulled out a thick scrapbook. “It’s okay. I’ve been working on a history lesson for the school kids anyways to teach them about it.”

Taking a deep breath, Poppy opened the book. The little paper cut out images sticking up. “A long time ago, back when trolls were still small and the six kingdoms lived their own separate lives, the pop trolls lived in perfect blissful harmony where we all would dance, hug and sing.

“One day, the trolls were discovered by the bergens, who back in the day didn’t know how to be happy. Seeing the trolls as happy as they were, the bergens wanted some of that happiness for themselves.”

Flipping the page again, the Smurfs saw an image of a bergen dropping a small troll into his mouth while a group of trolls watched in shock and horror. Poppy after a moment flipped the page again and continued.

“Eating a troll filled the Bergens with so much happiness, that they trapped all the pop trolls to have a taste of that happiness once a year on a day they called, Trollstice. The pop trolls endured this for many years, until the ruler of the pop trolls came up with a brave escape plan to save his people, and his child who the royal bergen family planned to feed to the young heir.

“As they escaped through the secret tunnels, the king would go back and save his people who couldn’t keep up, chanting “No troll left behind!”. After a long and deadly journey, the pop trolls escaped the clutches of the Bergens and were free.

“Over time, the troll species began to evolve into what we are today. Growing and becoming stronger, and spreading our love and music around. While the Bergens remained the same. Sad, unhappy, and bitter over the loss of the trolls. Until one day, they found them again.”

The next page revealed a pop up picture of a Bergen, spying on the now more humanoid trolls as they threw a party, unaware of the danger nearby-

Creek interrupted by blurting out loudly. “Bloody hell that’s awful! How does so much yuck come out of a little thing?!”

Rolling his eyes at the dramatic demon, Brainy glanced at Poppy before finishing up with changing Tiny. “Sorry, please continue.”

“...Still after the trolls’ happiness, the Bergens attacked. Now though, the pop trolls were not about to let history repeat itself and took a stand. Resulting in a war that lasted for many generations. During this war, the other troll tribes, tecno, country, funk, classical, and rock, decided to reach out and lend a helping hand. Resulting in the six troll tribes to be reunited.

“But their help wasn’t enough. The Pop trolls were at risk of being wiped out, and soon the other troll kingdoms were at risk to follow. Until one day.” 

Flipping the page again, a cut out paper image of a beautiful troll queen popped up, standing in front of a bergen queen who towered over her.

“Queen Lily sent a message of peace to the Bergens. Queen Camilla being the first Bergen willing to hear what she had to say. During their meeting, Queen Lily helped open up Queen Camilla’s eyes to the possibility that Bergens have happiness within them, they just needed help to find it.”

Pulling a small tab on the page made the little paper figures reach out and hold hands, showing that they were now friends.

“Their friendship was so strong, and so beautiful, the war came to a complete stop. The Bergens now seeing that they can be happy layed down their weapons, and peace between the Bergens and trolls began.”

Poppy closed the book and put it away before facing the group again. “My mom twenty years ago ended the war with the Bergens that nearly wiped us out. Us now being good friends with a lot of Bergen citizens who moved here for more peaceful and joyful lives… But things have been kinda shaky after she and Queen Camilla passed on when I was a baby. King Gristle Senior only kept the peace out of respect for his wife.”

Taking in the information, Hefty scowled. “And with the Berginites being a cousin species to the Bergens, if Branch turns down the wedding now you’d be at serious risk going back to war… There has to be a way out of this.”

Before anyone could think of any idea to stop this wedding, a knock at the door was heard. A guard on the other side spoke up. “Princess Poppy? Gargamel requests for the smurfs to meet him in his lab.”

In the corner of his eye Creek noticed Brainy tense up as he gave Tiny back to Guy. Looking around the other smurfs seemed to look uncomfortable as well.

“... I think I’ll tag along too. Didn’t get a good look at the castle yesterday and I want to see if that wizard is as big of a nitwit as he looks.”

Brainy looked at Creek in surprise who was avoiding looking at them, making the smart smurf smile a little. “Eh, nitwit might be a decent way of describing him.”

Sitting back down so Guy could finish freshening her up, Poppy put on a small smile. “We’ll see you guys later than. Trollex and I are going to be pretty busy until the wedding starts.”   
  
As the smurfs started to leave, Hefty paused in front of King Trollex, bowing a little respectfully. “Sorry we didn’t get a good chance to meet you, your highness.”

“Trollex is just fine, and it’s alright. I just wish it was under better circumstances… I worry about Branch a lot.”

Straightening up, the strong smurf gave the king a determined look. “I don’t know if this will mean much, but I promise I’ll do my best to look out for Branch during our time here.”

King Trollex, caught by surprise by that statement, soon smiled at the smurf. “You know what? I think I believe you.”

/

“I’m sorry you want our WHAT?”

In Gargamel’s lab in the castle, Hefty stood firmly over Gargamel, him now being as large as a human and taller than the old wizard being quite the advantage. With Smurfette standing by his side both her and Hefty shielded Brainy and Clumsy from the man in case he tried anything. Creek leaning on the wall next to the window as he watched the whole thing.

  
Rolling his eyes, Gargamel held up a flask with a tube attached to it. “Your blood. Considering how against animals, and magical creatures, cruelty these trolls are, I can’t experiment on you by draining the magic from you and leaving you as empty magicless husks. So your blood is the next best thing.”

Seeing the Smurfs were still unsure, Gargamel sighed as he put the flask down. “Look, you don’t like me, and I obviously hate you smurfs, but I have a legit job now. You don’t have to trust me, in fact if you did that would be stupid of you, but we both have something against the other. I know if I do anything shady, you will rat me out. So I won’t.”

Smurfette stepped forward, still glaring at the man. “Our blood will be what helps the king, right?”

“Technically, their blood will. You little missy will be useless to me. As if that’s anything new.”

Taking a deep breath to calm her temper, the female smurf continued. “Fine, but you’re not allowed to stick a needle in them and drain their blood. I’ll do it, just tell me how.”

Giving a shrug, Gargamel instructed what to do as Hefty volunteered first, Brainy and Clumsy sticking close to Creek while the other two smurfs were busy. The demon quietly whispered to Brainy. “What does he mean Smurfette will be useless? Is female smurf blood different from male?”

“... In a way… I don’t like this. Gargamel is useless on his own but smurf magic is really powerful stuff. He might not even help the king at all.”

His ear twitching slightly, Creek glanced out the window and saw where the castle farm animals were kept. The pigs being right under the window to the lab.

“... Well, why don’t we make ourselves a little insurance then?”

/

Okay, so Hefty didn’t feel great for a lot of reasons.

First reason, it took Smurfette a few tries to properly draw his blood and even though he put on a brave face his arm throbbed under the bandage covering where the needle went in, many times.

Second reason, he gave the most blood and boy did he feel weird. But as long as his bros didn’t have to give as much to Gargamel then it was worth it.

Third reason, he wasn’t happy over the fact that they were now going behind the king’s back.

After Gargamel left the lab because someone complained that Azrael was clawing up the furniture, Creek took off for a bit and came back with a pig from outside, using it’s blood to taint the blood they gave to the wizard.

This was only to make sure that Gargamel wasn’t up to something bad. If he was, then his evil plan might blow up in his face.

So why did Hefty feel so smurfing crappy about it?

With a bottle of tainted blood in his hands, Hefty went to look for the wizard who has yet to come back. Checking the kitchen, Hefty stopped at the sight of all the sweets and drinks sitting out before the wedding.

Well he was a little dehydrated, maybe a quick drink won’t hurt.

Putting the bottle of blood down, he began looking around for a cup, when he finally found one Hefty Smurf turned around.

And froze at the sight of Prince Bash standing there smiling smugly at him. “Thought I saw a big blue loser come in here. Trying to get a slice of cake before the wedding?”

Oh yeah, and his fourth reason for feeling lousy. Branch was getting married to that guy.

Hefty frowned, gripping his glass a bit tighter. “What do you want?”

The Berginite prince strolled around the room, inspecting all the food. “Just thought I’d come in here and see the guy who tried stealing my blushing bride-oops, I mean groom.”

“I didn’t try stealing Branch, I was trying to help him avoid marrying a jerk like you who doesn’t show respect to his future husband! Why are you doing this?! Branch obviously won’t love you!”

Smirking, Bash stuck out a finger and scooped some frosting off the cake with his finger before licking it off. “Guess telling you won’t do harm, can’t prove it and no one will believe you. I just want to party.”

Seeing the smurf confused, Bash continued. “Pop trolls throw the wildest parties and are the biggest pushovers. My crew and I are going to drain this place of all it’s supplies during the most wicked party ever. Marrying the prince wannabe is just an easy way to get access and free range without anyone stopping us. Plus Branch isn’t that bad looking, he might be fun later on.”

Hefty, was, disgusted. He wanted to hurt this guy so badly, but if he did he might put the pop trolls and the smurfs here at risk. “You are not going to get away with this.”

Picking up a bottle, Bash’s smirk didn’t waiver as he raised it to his lips. “I’d like to see you try to stop me.”

Taking a drink, the Berginite prince’s face cringes as he forces himself to swallow and put the bottle down. “Ugh, Trolls have weird taste in fancy drinks though.”

Eyes now wide, the smurf had to do his best to keep a straight face when he watched Bash drink his tainted blood like an idiot. “...Yeah, they sure do.”

Wiping his mouth, Bash started heading out. “Anyways, you enjoy the wedding. You and the other blue losers are all invited.”

With the prince now gone, Hefty finally allowed himself to smile as he picked up the bottle of blood. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

/

Yet again, everyone has gathered at the church for the wedding. Now with a few new extra guests attending.

As Brainy took in the details of the trolls church he leaned over and whispered to Hefty. “I still don’t understand why you insisted you wanted to come to this wedding. None of us want to watch this!”

Pulling out a cigarette, Creek started snapping his fingers to spark a flame. “Speak for yourself. I’m looking forward to this.”

Plucking the cigarette from the demon before he could light it, King Trollex ignored the dirty look he got as he handed it to Smurfette who crushed it under her shoe. “I’m not. Branch won’t listen to anyone anymore. I swear if I have to I’m objecting in the middle of this whole thing.”

Hefty kept his eyes firmly on Bash, who was standing at the front of the church with a smug grin. “I don’t think you have to worry about that.”

Before Trollex had the chance to ask what he meant by that, Trollzart’s music started filling the room and everyone watched as Branch entered with Peppy, both of them walking down the aisle. With a determined frown Trollex opened his mouth, ready to object to this whole thing-

  
_ “SQUEE!” _

Everyone turned their attention to the front of the church, Branch and Peppy stopping as they looked over at Bash, who had his hand firmly planted over his mouth.

Slowly, the prince lowered his hand, not noticing that his body started giving off a magical blue glow. “S-sorry I- SQUEE- I uh, I feel kinda weird…”

Everyone in the church gasped in shock and horror as Bash started to slowly transform. When the glowing stopped an “Oh my god!” could be heard from a surprised Smidge at what they were all looking at.

Standing in Bash’s place, was now a big, fat, pig.

“... WHAT THE FUCK?!?!”

Hefty covered his mouth to hold back his laughter as the crowd started a confused uproar. Creek didn’t hold back though as he was laughing so hard he was wiping tears from his eyes. “Oh this is priceless! I bloody love this kingdom!”   
****

**“QUIET!”**

Silence quickly befell the room at the king’s booming voice. Branch leaning away from him in shock at his raised voice while Peppy rubbed his temple tiredly. “Okay, okay. This is getting ridiculous. I’m going to listen to my gut here. My boy is not getting married, especially not to a pig!”

Poppy, Trollex, the smurfs, and the snack pack all sighed in relief while Branch stared at Peppy flabbergasted. Standing up, Chef quickly made her way to the king. “But-but sire, what about the alliance? Angering the Berginites could have dire consequences-”

“Actually, not really.”

Hearing an unexpected voice, everyone looked surprised as Archer stepped forward. Snapping out of his shock, Bash glared at him. “You better shut your trap!”

Ignoring him, Archer continued. “I have a confession to make because this has gone on too far. Bash isn’t the prince of the Berginites. We’re a runaway gang called the Party Crashers who planned on raiding your kingdom by Bash marrying Branch. I’m telling you this now because this situation has gotten a little out of hand.”

Shocked gasps filled the room, along with another “Oh my god!”. Shocked by the news herself, Chef growled angrily. “You lying little PIGS. GUARDS!”

With the guards rounding up and arresting the Party Crashers, Poppy settled down the crowd with the offer of a party to all the people that went through all the trouble of attending this wedding. Everyone satisfied and happy, they all began to leave the church to get on with their day and set up Poppy’s party.

Hanging back, Peppy held onto Branch by his shoulders and looked him firmly in the eyes. “Branch, tell me the truth, did you want to get married?”

Still somewhat in shock from everything that went down, Branch started at Peppy and into his eyes searching for the truth.

“... No. I just, wanted to make everyone happy...”

The king sighed as he pulled Branch into a hug. “Branch, we’ll be happy when you’re happy. Now no more of this self sacrificing just for everyone else’s sake garbage, okay?”

Hesitating for a moment, Branch awkwardly patted Peppy’s back. “Okay… So what happens now?”

Pulling back, Peppy sighed. “We return everyone’s wedding gifts, throw those Party Crashers out of the kingdom, and enjoy Poppy’s party before our royal friends have to go home. Will you attend the party?”

Grimacing, Branch wanted to say no until he noticed the smurfs waiting nearby, chatting with Poppy, Creek and Trollex. The prince gave a small sigh. “ I’ll think about it.”

Giving Branch one last affectionate pat on the back, Peppy went on his way as Branch headed to the group.

Seeing him, Poppy smiled gleefully as she rushed to him and gave him a big hug. “I’m so glad you don’t have to marry that creep!”

Grunting from the tight hug, Branch patted her back as he looked at Trollex who was smiling back at him. “Hey, um, about what I said yesterday? I-”

Trollex cut him off by joining the hug. “I know buddy. It’s okay.”   


  
The hug continued for a few moments until Branch started to squirm. “Okay, that’s enough. Poppy don’t you have a party to plan? It’ll be the smurf’s first troll party.”

Gasping excitedly, Poppy let go of the hug and turned to Smurfette, grabbing her hand. “You have to tell me what kind of things smurfs love! This party will be amazing!”

As the rest of the group started to leave, Trollex ruffling Branch’s hair before he followed Poppy, Hefty stayed behind with Branch. Chuckling as he crossed his arms. “Man. Bash turning into a pig. That was unexpected.”

“You had something to do with that didn’t you?”

“... Maybe.”

Snorting a little in amusement, Branch smirked at the Smurf. “God you’re a doofus…. Poppy’s probably going to drive the other smurfs nuts quizzing them over everything they like to make the party perfect. How about I save you from that and show you around the kingdom?”

Hefty’s smile grew at that offer. “I’d like that.”


End file.
